This is based on the knowledge that:
- I often buy multiple cans at the same time, when they're on special.
- It is not inconceivable that I would store it in the fridge to keep cool, just highly unlikely that I would make it to the fridge without drinking it on the way.
- I have a terrible memory. If I did store it, I would forget. This would explain why it has been unclaimed for around three months.
- No one else here, to my knowledge, consumes energy drinks.
- No one here, to my knowledge, reads my blog, so they won't know it was me. And I eliminated all witnesses. Mwuhahahaha.
- Ha.
- Ha.
WIIIIIIIIINGS.
That being said, I don't think I really require an energy hit right now. But I'm not sure I can return it to the fridge without anyone noticing. Also, then this whole Spiel might start again:
There's an unclaimed can of Red Bull in the fridge.
It could be mine.
I am the most likely candidate as owner.
If I do take it no one will know.
If it IS mine, I have been missing out.
One week later: that can is still there.
Ditto.
Ditto.
PS: some people have suggested attaching a note to it, asking if anyone else stakes a claim. But that wouldn't be diabolical enough.
PPS: just taking it isn't particularly diabolical either, more a case of petty larceny.
